V

alues aren’t just ideas we like—they’re commitments we’re willing to act on, even when it’s hard. Children begin forming their moral compass early, but they need help testing and strengthening it. Whether it’s a moment of unfairness at school or a hard choice with friends, what matters isn’t just what they feel—it’s what they’re willing to stand for. Ancient thinkers like Socrates didn’t just argue about truth—they lived it, even at personal cost. You don’t need to raise a philosopher, but you can raise someone who lives with integrity. A good starting point: “What made that feel right or wrong to you?”

One summer night, my son came home from a game that had turned tense. Someone had bent the rules, and no one had called it out. He paced the porch, frustrated—unsure if staying silent had been the right thing. We talked. I asked, “What part of that bugged you most?” He thought about it, then said, “It wasn’t fair, and I knew it.” That word gave him footing. We role-played the moment. He tried out his voice. The next day, he used it. Not to punish anyone, but to hold the line. That moment helped him feel what it means to live by what you believe—even when it’s uncomfortable.

You can build this habit by making values part of daily life. During walks, meals, or car rides, ask about a small decision: “What would you do if that happened to you?” or “What would feel fair if someone broke the rules?” Let them wrestle. Don’t rush to shape their answer—trust them to think it through. And when they do speak up, praise the effort to act with integrity. It’s not about always being right. It’s about staying true to what matters, even when no one’s watching.

TIPS

• Ask what they stand for, not just what they believe
• Praise the action, not just the reasoning
• Let discomfort be part of the conversation

ACTIVITIES

• Value Roleplay: Act out a tricky moment, try different responses
• Line Drawing: Ask where they’d draw the line in a real situation
• Story Share: Tell them about a time you stood up for something that mattered